Plannen, overzicht, structuur en ordenen…

..dit alles is niet het sterktste punt van mijn beide middelbare-scholiere-kuikens.
Ze hebben het niet van een vreemde want ook ik was hier vroeger een ramp in.
Door het-niet-kunnen-plannen had ik vroeger ook geen overzicht. En heel eerlijk gezegd vond ik het wel best. Daardoor ben ik nu héél goed in crisismanagement. Als plan A dreigt te mislukken kan ik naadloos over op plan B. Ik heb geleerd vertrouwen te hebben in “een goede afloop” en raak dus niet van de leg als iets niet helemaal “volgens planning” loopt. Mede omdat ik dus vaak geen planning heb. Best lekker, kan ik je zeggen. Ik ben een kei in ad-hock dingen oplossen en presteer het beste onder enige druk. Ik ben zo’n type die met haar jas al aan (omdat we op visite gaan) nog even snel een zelfgemaakt kadootje zeer creatief inpakt en er nog een gedicht bij schrijft in 5 minuten. Of de lekkerste dingen op tafel weet te toveren als we onverwachts bezoek krijgen.

Deze laissez-faire-houding past bij mij. Ik vaar er goed bij; zou het denk ik niet anders kunnen of willen. Mijn echtgenoot denkt daar soms anders over. Hij is het tegenovergestelde wat dat betreft. Plannen en vooruit kijken, weten waar je aan toe bent voor de broodnodige rust in het hoofd is waar híj van houdt! Regelmatig vraagt hij aan mij: “En, wat is het plan?” en verwacht daar dan ook een gestuctureerd en weloverdacht antwoord op.
Omdat we allebei niet geloven in toeval zijn we er dus van overtuigd dat we van elkaar kunnen leren. Hij een beetje loslaten, wat lastig is voor een controle freak, en ik een klein beetje meer structuur in alles, wat lastig is voor een “makkelijk typje”.

In de afgelopen jaren (Lief en ik zijn nu 8 jaar samen) heb ik inderdaad geleerd dat ik het huishouden bijvoorbeeld prima kan organiseren als ik me houd aan mijn to-do-lijstje (anders komt er geen bal van terecht en schuif ik alles door naar “morgen”..).
Samen plannen we…en laten we los. Maar dit zal altijd ons sparringspunt blijven vrees ik.

Afijn, ik had het dus over mijn 2 dochters die, net als hun moeder, erfelijk belast zijn met slordigheid. HIER schreef ik er al eens een blogje over.
Ik ben dus geen moeder die haar kinderen elke keer vraagt of ze hun kamer willen opruimen. Ik help ze wel bij het ordenen. Als al hun kleding verplaatst is van kast naar grond moeten ze dat zelf weten en krijgen ze daar niks van. Maar dat is met schoolboeken en schriften anders. We hebben hier aan de lijve ondervonden dat hun schoolprestaties lijden onder ongeorganiseerdheid. Het feit dat de meiden AL hun schoolboeken óm de week van papa naar mama moesten sjouwen ivm co-ouderschap hielp daar niet aan mee. Sinds kort wonen Juliëtte en Merlijne bij ons (dus geen co-ouderschap meer) en hoeven ze niet meer te slepen met hun spullen. Dat is fijn want zo langzamerhand komt er rust.

Foto 12-11-14 13 57 03

Voor allebei kochten we houten bakken bij Ikea voor hun schoolboeken. Vak per bak. Heel handig en overzichtelijk. Er worden geen boeken meer vergeten. Er zijn geen boeken ineens “kwijt”.

Foto 12-11-14 13 57 17

Ik kan het iedereen aanraden!

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  1. Jeroen

    Goed idee, zo’n vakbak! Kunnen ze het niet-toegevoegde vak tekenen gebruiken om die saaie bakken leuk te beschilderen?

    Nu ga ik mijn hersens pijnigen om te verzinnen wat het vak ‘periode’ zou kunnen inhouden. Ik kan alleen maar aan dat schap in de supermarkt denken waar ik nooit kom.

    1. Barbaramama Bericht auteur

      Hahaha!
      Mijn dochters zitten op de vrije school, Jeroen.
      En het periode onderwijs is kenmerkend voor de vrije school. Ik zal op je facebookpagina wel even een linkje plaatsen zodat je er wat meer over kunt lezen.

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